Back in 2008 it seemed as if everything was easier for
her. Living, for example. Caring. Listening to this guy she barely knew talking
about how badly he wanted to visit the bay of San Francisco because of his
father's favorite song that turned out to be his favorite one after years of detesting it. The guy that ran into
her asking for directions one cold Saturday morning, the month of October,
maybe... Usually, she played the "Sorry,
I'm not from here" card, but it felt like the right place and the
right time to start feeling part of the city already. After all, she had been
there for almost six years at the time. It wasn't an instant reaction, but deep
inside she knew the guy would be important in her life, although not completely
in a good, nice, healthy manner. Something odd, ruffling in her stomach,
swallowed the strangeness of the foreboding. Without realizing, she started to
gather bills, tickets Her wallet was always full with papers with numbers on
them, numbers that had shifted from 30€ to 50€ at the supermarket, from 1 movie
ticket to 2. Drafts on napkins in cafes and tea shops with her face on them,
because he liked to draw, even when he knew he was not good at it. And all of a
sudden everything was happening without a reason, with no rush. Perhaps what
disturbed her was the awkward sensation of not recognizing the feeling, the
simplicity of the process.
Her own body kept her from knowing where the orgasms
were hidden, and with him they started the game of finding them. She could
never picture that an act so violent against her body would give her so much
pleasure. And, quite frankly, she had never, and will never again put herself
in such a contingent position with someone. As the months passed, things
started to run up in this way: all the trains she took were from where she
lived to where he was, the restaurants they went to were thoroughly chosen
accordingly by his taste and preference, and the funny thing about these little
details was that she didn't even notice, or in the case that she did, she did
not care at all. The 'thing', almost physical, that they were creating started
developing its own motion, growing up faster than she had thought it could. And
as it was getting bigger, it started to become thinner. In fact, exactly like a
bubble of gum.
To be continued...